Diary of an oxygen thief Review
Here are my thoughts so far on chapters 1 and 2 ☺️
Diary of an Oxygen Thief is a deeply unsettling book that exposes the toxic, narcissistic mindset of its unnamed narrator. From the very first chapter, he openly brags about hurting women, describing it as premeditated with phrases like “search of hearts to stab” and even likening it to “tearing flesh from the bone.” The blunt, detached, and almost bored tone of his writing makes the book feel intentionally difficult to read—something the narrator seems to revel in, given his own admiration for writers who appear “clever, laid back, almost bored with themselves.” It’s clear this was deliberate, reflecting not only his love for this style but also his desire to control how readers experience his story, forcing us into the same emotional detachment he thrives on. At times, it even feels as though he’s feeding off the reader’s discomfort, much like he feeds off the pain of his victims, as if our shock and unease give him the validation he craves.
The narrator’s contradictions are glaring and impossible to ignore. He claims he only hurt women mentally, yet later admits to physical violence and even a horrifying accusation of r*pe. His unreliable perspective makes it hard to take anything he says at face value, as he constantly shifts blame, justifies his behaviour, and manipulates both his victims and the reader. What’s most disturbing is the way the book silences the women he hurt. We don’t get to hear how they feel or how his abuse affected them—it’s all filtered through his self-centered lens, as though their pain exists solely to serve his story. Even naming one of his victims, “Penelope Arlington,” feels like another attempt to target and hurt her, long after he’s lost access to her.
As I read, I found myself bored and uninterested at times, almost dismissing the narrator as another man bragging about how broken he is. But I realized that in doing so, I was mirroring the very dismissal his father showed him when he said, “I don’t care.” That parallel made me think about how society often overlooks toxic behaviour until it’s too late. The narrator’s line about Penelope “abandoning herself to the meaning of [his] words” and leaving the door open for him after his abuse highlights this pattern. It’s unsettling to think about how manipulation and toxicity can escalate over time, with early signs dismissed until the damage is undeniable.
The book also made me reflect on my own life—on toxic signs I may have brushed aside or refused to acknowledge until they caused real harm. The blurb’s line, “what we do to each other and what we allow to have done to us,” stands out here. Is the narrator blaming his victims for allowing themselves to be hurt? If so, it’s another layer of manipulation, forcing readers to question their own boundaries and morality. The revelation that he may have been sexually abused as a child adds context but doesn’t justify his actions. Instead, it feels like another way to complicate how we perceive him—another layer of the cycle of pain he perpetuates.
Honestly, I’m really struggling to finish Diary of an Oxygen Thief. It’s frustrating because I keep thinking about how the guy who wrote this—or someone like him—is probably still out there, living his best life, making money off this book 💰, while leaving behind so much pain. It’s hard to wrap my head around, and it honestly makes me not want to give him any more attention.
The part that shocked me the most was when he admitted he wanted to be the reason a woman decides to take her own life. I literally gasped reading that. Like, who even thinks that way? It’s so nasty and cruel, and I don’t think I’ve ever read about someone this awful. At this point, I hope he doesn’t get a happy ending because people like him shouldn’t just walk away from the damage they’ve caused.